Numb still

I am writing this from the bath.... Over the last few weeks after having the d & c and mirena fitted I have felt very low.... The girlie problems are still there and something happened that made me want to crawl into bed a never ever get out..... LB a massive apology to you I never understood your feelings of 'no more babies' even though I knew after B2 was 3 weeks old and many many visits to the doctors to have all my girlie bits taken out and DA having the snip about 10 years ago I now realise this is it for me....... The Gyno said yes to taking them all out but with my blood disorder try the other thing first as a happy as I was to give it a go and took it in my stride. Until my rock had her baby a boy her last she says ...... I couldn't make myself go and see her I cried every time I got a text with a new angle of his cuteness ..... Then she brought him into work unexpectedly ...... I held it together there but can't anymore that will never be me..... Only 1 other baby has made me feel this way he was born the day B2 started kindy and is now a very big school boy @ B2's school I see him and smile:) no babies in the shop do it I'm ok with them just this little man ..... Still more tears and I don't want anymore children I just have been told I can't !!





Here he is with MrDs on his first school visit xox